The Power of the Pooch

Is “man’s best friend” more than that?

We think it is. A dog’s power on health cannot be understated. Dogs simply make people happy.  Period. They’re company, comfort, fun, protection, security and make people laugh and feel valued. 

The greetings at the door make you feel wanted and needed and unconditionally loved and accepted. Literally, dogs don’t care what you look like, smell like, weigh… they only care about your presence. Continue reading “The Power of the Pooch”

YOU are Your Best Investment

YOU are with yourSelf more than anyone else throughout your entire life. This is true for us all, from the moment we’re born to the moment we take our last breath. Essential to living a courageous life, nothing could be more important than investing in YOU for this journey. YOU are truly your best investment.

There are essentially 3 meanings of the word, invest:

  • to commit (money) resources in order to earn a (financial) return,
  • to make use of resources for future benefits or advantages, and
  • to involve or engage, especially emotionally.

Many of us, including myself, learned to only put others first. That it’s polite to prioritize other peoples’ wants and needs, thoughts and feelings over one’s own. And, that it’s bad to be impolite. I was socialized this way. In fact, it was expected of me, seen as selfish not to be this way. Perhaps the belief is that to invest in others one is investing in one’s own security. So, in this way, prioritizing others becomes a self-preserving strategy, which could be construed as investing in oneself. The impact of not putting others first can be fear / panic, shame and guilt inducing, so putting others first can also be a protective measure against these difficult feelings. And, prioritizing only others can be a recipe for resentment – which is a mixture of disgust, sadness, perceived injustice, anger, fear and disappointment. This is basically a path to profound regret, because not investing in oneself over time leaves you without.

For me, It’s been a journey to unlearn this conditioning and to evolve into a balanced practice of setting healthy boundaries and honoring both mySelf and Others- learning Self-Care. We each exist with innate capacities, resources, rights, feelings and purpose. Only by investing in YOU first through prioritizing honoring your capacities, resources, rights, feelings and purpose can you align your life’s mission – this is saying YES to your WHY (you’re here). Then, from this YES-to-your-WHY-alignment, you show up, for not only yourSelf but for Others too.

By investing in YOU by honoring your life’s priorities, while respecting others at the same time, you’re cultivating inner materialism … the inner good stuff… inner treasures… calm, peace and sweetness of heart. This is the essence of Self-Care.

What resources will you commit to YOU now for a return on this investment? How will you make use of this investment into the future? How could you up level your involvement and engagement now to achieve success in Self-Care? And, what will it cost if you don’t?

Put YOU first – express, play, create, move, dance, plant seeds, nourish your body, mind, heart, soul. Laugh until you cry. Cry if you need to. Dare to be “selfish” – think of it as soul-setting. Listen to your heart. And, attend to your relationships from this place of Self Leadership.

Invest in YOU because:

YOU, your life and your mission matters.

You won’t regret building equity in YourSelf.

You could seriously regret it if you don’t… and it’s never too late to make the investment.

It feels good to cultivate treasures of the heart and the more treasures you feel, the more treasures you’ll create. And, the more you’ll be able to show and do for others. 

Your life depends on it.

And, you deserve to live your life feeling good, creating good and knowing you matter. And, most of all, the world needs YOU to live your mission. 



From Gaslighting to Freedom

Developing skills for dealing effectively with gaslighting and its pervasive and insidiously destructive impact is essential for mastering courageous living. Why? Because using tactics to induce vulnerability, insecurity, fear and shame is the modus operandi of the gaslighter. So being brave and skillfully courageous in the face of coping with gaslighting and the gaslighter is critical for success. It’s essential to not only see gaslighting for what it is but most importantly develop resiliency for rising back when it occurs and immunity protection from its negative impact going forward.

Continue reading “From Gaslighting to Freedom”

“Feeling Fat”? Techniques that Help

feeling fat

“Feeling fat” is the sensation that seemingly comes out of nowhere that your weight has suddenly gone up exponentially. You know what I’m talking about, right? The “fat attack.” It’s brutal. And to effectively cope with it requires consciously managing your Chi – your energy, your life force, and your mindset.

I think of it actually as more of a “lack attack” – meaning it’s a state of being that results from a deficiency of some kind of nourishment or a belief in lack. Maybe the deficiency is sleep, food, attention, love, trust and/or mindset – meaning a belief in not being enough – good enough, thin enough, pretty enough, smart enough, rich enough, etc.

I believe the most helpful response to “fat/lack attacks” is to explore… to go deeper. Ask yourself, what am I actually lacking such as, am I sleep deprived? Am I food deprived? Am I love and validation deprived? Am I believing a story that’s fear or shame or guilt based? And, is there a story about defectiveness, lack or not enoughness that I’m buying into? Then, really listen. Deeply. Continue reading ““Feeling Fat”? Techniques that Help”

Courageous Boundaries Create a Successful Life

Courageous boundaries are essential to leading a successful life. This is especially true in 3 key areas of living: time, rest and communication. Time is precious. And, one’s relationship with time is a reflection of circumstances, resources, priorities and behaviors – all influencing quality rest… and communication. The ability to set, have and hold quality boundaries hugely depends on how we feel – our mood and thereby, how we orient. When we feel empowered we orient towards that vibration, which rest supports, and we set empowering boundaries, and so it goes…

Values and beliefs underlie what gets prioritized and how we behave. They influence how, why, what and with whom we share. And, it all boils down to time. Basically, we devote time to things and those we care about. And, who, what, why, and how we care about something or someone says everything about who we are, our self-capacities – esteem, worth, identity, and the like. Basically, who and what we say “yes” to and who and what we so “no” to depends on our life condition – and I assert, one’s inner life condition, since how we feel inside is where every personal moment ultimately begins. And, this inner state filters and directs our attention, which is ultimately how one guides their life. This is why every moment counts and mastering mindset is so critical to courageous living. Because how we spend our time is our life. Period. Continue reading “Courageous Boundaries Create a Successful Life”